Emotional Intelligence and Resonant Leadership in IT

Some time ago I went through the book Primal Leadership: Learning to Lead with Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman, Richard Boyatzis and Annie McKee and Resonant Leadership by Richard Boyatzis and Annie McKee. In the fall of 1995 I went through the Managerial Assessment and Development course at the Weatherhead School of Management at Case Western Reserve University, and there is some material from that course mirrored in Primal Leadership.

In Primal Leadership, the authors distinguish between resonant leadership and dissonant leadership, and explain the following leadership styles:

• Visionary (Resonant): Guiding people by and toward shared dreams.

• Coaching (Resonant): Connects a person to the organization by linking their strengths, weaknesses and personal goals to the long term goals of the organization.

• Affiliative (Resonant): Connects people through emotional ties and shared concern for each other.

• Democratic (Resonant): Connecting people to the organization by listening to them and involving them in the process of getting ideas, making decisions and setting direction.

• Pacesetting (Dissonant): The leader holds and exemplifies high performance standards, and demands the same from others.

• Commanding (Dissonant): The leader commands, often demanding immediate compliance without any explanations.

As I went through this book, my sense was that within IT, the last, the commanding style, was by far the most prevalent, although it’s marked as the least effective. In fact, the commanding style tends to management by threat and intimidation. This whole style tends to be extremely stressful and counterproductive in the long run. The other dissonant style, pacesetting, tends to micromanagement, and seems to be characteristic of managers and leaders who are technically adept, or imagine themselves to be technically adept. This style also tends to be stressful, and puts people into survival mode. Dissonant leadership tends to discourage, burn out, and drive away people and send them home with chronic stress. I believe that much turnover in IT comes down to dissonant leadership, and the overuse of the commanding style.

Where do people learn the dissonant style? There’s a reason on page 155: “

"  . . . people pick up their leadership habits rather haphazardly over the course of life through repeating what they see their models do, or through repeating their own attempts at leading."

This is probably why poor leaders often look like a common definition of insanity ("keep on doing the same thing while expecting different results"). People come to IT management and leadership often without any effective personal coaching in leadership and management – so they act out what they have experienced, seen or imagined to be effective leadership –and they fall into dissonant leadership. The dissonant styles also look a lot like the classic military model of leadership, although recently the U.S. military has been working toward incorporating much more of the resonant styles into their leadership model.

Here are some ideas for incorporating the more resonant styles in IT:

• Visionary (Resonant): Guiding people by and toward shared dreams.

Relate whatever projects and tasks in the organization are being done to the overall purpose of the organization. Let those in the organization know that they are contributing to a positive vision. Don’t make this something done once in a long while, but fairly often. Do this without cliches or platitudes, but exemplify that you believe in the vision also.

• Coaching (Resonant): Connects a person to the organization by linking their strengths, weaknesses and personal goals to the long term goals of the organization.

Get to know the people in the group as individuals in an in depth manner. Work with them to make best use of their strengths and to minimize their working in areas of their weaknesses. Learn where they want to go in their career and life, and provide as much support as you can.

Do more management by walking around. Find out what people are doing, what is energizing them and what they see is causing them headaches and what their obstacles are. Help them to find and work out solutions. Help them to get training when it is possible; seek to make this a part of the budget.

• Affiliative (Resonant): Connects people through emotional ties and shared concern for each other.

Give people occasions to connect with each other. Show concern when people are going through difficult personal times.

• Democratic (Resonant): Connecting people to the organization by listening to them and involving them in the process of getting ideas, making decisions and setting direction.

Allow people to become part of the decision making process as much as possible. Discussing a decision with them, the pros and cons, as if it were their decision to make, may bring buy-in and commitment, even when they don't have the final say.

Here are some ideas on when to use the dissonant styles:

• Pacesetting (Dissonant): The leader holds and exemplifies high performance standards, and demands the same from others.

Use this style when the leader does have technical expertise and when working with an inexperienced team. Otherwise, let the experienced and knowledgeable work without micromanagement.

• Commanding (Dissonant): The leader commands, often demanding immediate compliance without any explanations.

Use this style sparingly. Give clear directions, but most authoritatively during a crisis and an emergency. Do not make ‘fake’ emergencies to make people jump to get something done.

In regard to any use of the commanding style, leaders would do well to remember the observation of Baron von Steuben when he was drilling American soldiers during the American Revolution. He said, “With European soldiers, I tell them what to do, and they do it. With American soldiers, I tell them what to do, and then I have to tell them why.”

#leadership #emotionalintelligence #resonantleadership #informationtechnology #softwaredevelopment